My Mid-Week Epiphany

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Wednesday-
(I've been doing some old-school blogging, i.e. paper and pen in a journal so this post is a day late)
I've been selfish. One a more base level than any spiritual application. I'm trying to do all kinds of things for myself (workout, lose weight, read, watch TV, relax by the pool, have a social life, etc.) and have been getting annoyed with my children when I can't do those things. I'm trying to find ways to shove them off and keep them "out of my hair" rather than engage them, train them, and share experiences/life with them.
Here's the epiphany: I've had it before but the light of this revelation can fade pretty quickly beneath potty-training, dirty diapers, nursing, nap refusals and so on.
They are the reason I am here.
If it weren't for these terrific children who don't always fit into the little boxes I try and create as life, I'd be out there in the corporate world again, and man talk about no time for me! My priorities should be, in this order, God, Darrell, Kids, Self.
So if I don't get a great night's sleep because people were making noise, it's OK not to go to the gym at 5 am. In fact, it's good to get some extra sleep so I can deal fairly with the charges that God entrusted to me and be prepared for the unexpected twists that the day might bring.
And if I happen to get an hour or so during the day when they're both asleep or busy, and the stars are aligned so that all my work is done, the house is clean and laundry dealt with, then maybe I can use that time for myself. Like by working on Lilly's baby book.